Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Disclaimer...I know nothing about transformers.   I think it was a toy or cartoon when I was little, but that type of stuff didn't hold my interest,  I liked cartoons about talking animals and stuff like that lol.

I can't really get into this and have only been half-watching it so far.  My man just came onscreen though so I'll watch.  I lol'd at his "W-T-F to thaat?"  line.  

"No toolery". Haha.  I love his fake tan in the pictures of himself on his desk. 

I just burst out laughing over the Asian guy pulling two guns on that...weird bird thing?  And it tossed him out the window.  Lesson learned: don't draw your weapon on a weird electronic bird.

Something else I've learned:  Shia LaBeouf has come a long way since Even Stevens.  I barely recognized him.

I still don't understand this movie though.  What is an autobot?  What is a septicon?  All I hear in that is "septic" which does not evoke pleasant imagery.  Wait, Discepticon?  That makes more sense.

Is Optimus Prime like the godfather of all the transformers?   I don't know,  I'm fast-forwarding until I see John again.   Oh wait, they got Bill O'Reilly for this?  I didn't know he had a sense of humor!

Ahaha they just quoted Tommy Boy <3.

I just fast-forwarded a long time and now the entire movie seems to have been taken over by CGI EVERYTHING.   I don't know what happened to Malkovich.  Did his character get killed?

Sorry - I just am not a fan of movies like this,  I tried to watch it...